Penemu..Anecdotes..Idea..- Ja'Lood.

hope comes last

2012-01-11T07:37:00.000-08:00

Little did i know i could this delicate & fragile. My emotions running low, being temperance for quite a while. Not a wanderlust could cure this bitterness. I'm just sicked & tired with all the nonsense engulfing this pathetic days of mine. Gosh, can't believe all these come from me!

I can swear & curse like nobody's business. To hell with image & reputation, too much of formalities my life can handle

There's a stumbling block on my journey, a big one. Never ever estimate how far i would go just to end this pain. Call me delusional of grandeur, call me loser, call me lonely cos yes those are all mine. Your jinx & curse that I will allow at all cost, if that makes you happy.

Actions are meant to be taken. Beyond words and sayings. I'm gonna start now, not that i never tried... impulsive? I know..

indefinite hiatus

2011-06-28T07:12:00.000-07:00

Like seriously? How fast time flies! It has been a year since my last update but am non apologetic since yours truly has never been in a serious commitment with this blog. Haha..

My hands are itchy to splurge on words tonight. Many things had happened throughout my idle being. Winning streaks, broken pencils, reacquainted, love, and all sorts of experiences that comes with life.

I recently switched job after serving for over a year with Malaysia's Number One Integrated Healthcare Provider. Currently employed with Malaysia's Overall Best Employer 2010 - go figure! Am truly blessed with this opportunity which leads to a new set of responsibilities and knowledge. Am excited to see the birth of my new "baby" soon and currently so busy anticipating my project to kicks off!

Am finally saying goodbye to the ever wonderful city of Shah Alam after good 6 years full of learning and adventures. This transition though a tad hard, is deemed as necessary given my new office is located in KL CBD, The Gardens, Mid Valley City that is. Kelana Jaya will be my new base for now and my new home is only a walking distance to KJ's LRT line! It will only cost me RM 2.80 to & fro MV.

With the current high end project I involved in, things are really moving now and there is never a dull moment in the office. Everyday lies a new set of challenges and learning opportunities. Am thankful for everyone who is significant in supporting me to embrace this transition period. You are my catalyst! You know who you are :-)

Everything you know, is just a drop in the ocean - Kak Min

Don't be afraid to screw up, the world is screwed up already - Anonymous boss

Off-The-Edge June 2010

2010-06-06T22:16:00.000-07:00

Yuna Zarai - finally she is featured in a most deserving manner in my most coveted Malaysia-SoPo-lifestyle magazine, Off The Edge, June 2010! Her entrance into the Malaysian art scene was groundbreaking. I remember been introduced to her stuff by my confidante, Nazirah back in 2007 - I was awestruck at the very first sight. The soul she sewn through her lyrics was brilliant, not to mention her sultry, timbre voice is definitely of a different league in comparison to other local female acts.

And what's the fuss with this one-time feature? As an avid reader of Off The Edge, being a true observant of everything SoPo in Malaysia, Off The Edge is a real deal. No other magazines in Malaysia could write sophisticated, bold and cutting edge stories like OTE. It gave me uh-ah moment - sense of enlightenment, true mental orgasm! I spotted Yuna in some sappy magazines - true indication on how sad Malaysian entertainment scene is (I'm sure she's just pleasing those media, but please la). But OTE is a real deal, just like Yuna, A Real Deal!

While some of the fans here were hitched by "Dan Sebenarnya" - a track undeniably easy on ears but the most bland track in her collections (in my opinion), I can simply be proud for following her stuff since day one. I think I can just bear with her even if she doesn't have a studio recorded EP or still being reclusive in her room (that's how she started) recording songs. But a true gem like Yuna deserves better recognition than just gossip magazines. Her existence is more than just serenading the crowds and making handsome cash. She sends a strong message that in the current depressing state of art scene in Malaysia, in the end only true form of self-expression, of its highest honesty will prevail. For once, Malaysian music has its own ambassador.

p/s: image taken from thedgemalaysia website. no copyright infringement intended.

A Quickie

2010-05-14T22:30:00.000-07:00

Ok, how should i start? Just to make it perfectly clear, this post is only for the sake of updating and i need a good reason to talk to my keypad.

1) I finished my 4 months internship & completed my final assignment even though deadline breached!

2) I'm officially working now - back to my old office, yeay! no more demure, passive intern.

3) I'm moving out to a new place, an apartment to be exact not anywhere out of Shah Alam - it's the place to be.

4) Was back in my home sweet home (Kuching) for a week to seek blessings from parents and fulfilled my wanderlust after hard days at work. Also met my long lost bestie Seng after 5 years of incommunicado! We'll make a point to poke each other oftenly on FB.

5) Found a new spot for savouring my crave for nasi lemak! It's Pak Hasan's at Kampung Baru, KL - too bad, he only opens in the morning, but i tell you it's worth waking up for.

6)After being back for two weeks to Shah Alam, my parents are coming to KL. Though Apak & Mami coming not in the same trip, a short meet up will do! Spend a night in KL with Mami last night and of course free dinner!

7) Financial prudence - is the way forward for me. From now on, i'm financially independent. No more asking for money or monthly allowance from parents or otherwise i'll get curse! Start planning for future and work hard for the money!

8) I miss Nazirah Ashari like a lot! In spite of that, i'm happy that she's finally in LA. She'll be good, i know:))

9) Change in my diet plan - good thing about working in pharmaceutical industry is that lots of free health screening! All in all, I've underwent 3 medical screening in my 5 months there! Surprisingly, I was passed with a clean bill of health, with ideal weight of 79kg (almost borderline la). I need to lose 11 kg and i think the next mission to trim my waistline. Downsize 2 or 3 inches is the way to go!

10) That's all. Glad to be alive! Amen!

rantings of an intern

2010-04-19T23:25:00.000-07:00

Finally I find a good reason to start writing again. Discipline is the chant I never managed to utter correctly. Laziness is the disease I was diagnosed with ever since.. forever. Dieting is non-existent in my dictionary. The ironic thing is that, I used to be a sort of, I don’t how to ideally define it but an individual with a towering personality – arguable and questionable. Well at least that’s how I felt la previously. If you have better noun to define me, please furnish me so.

My current state of being is nothing but a total straight forward programmed, pre-planned life. I’m confined to my desk in the office from 8.30 am – 5.30 pm with mostly writing assignment. Never thought one day I’ll be manning business report – yes, with all the jargons and technicalities which I rather not knowing before. Still, I managed to stand my 4 months internship which will end this Friday (that’s 3 days from now) tentatively and subsequently pledge to stay loyal to the company for my official employment. I do have my ups and downs here, but thanks to the ‘fabulous” colleagues in my division for believing in me and accepting me just the way I am.

Works aside, I’m start feeling a sense of emptiness while at home. The whole brotherhood consists of 10 persons but since most of us have started our respective trainings, we barely have the time spent together. Nevertheless, this semester marks the end of stay for us in that ‘home sweet home’ of us smack in the middle of Jalan Kristal Shah Alam. We had thrown the craziest birthday bashes ever to celebrate Lah and Faizul’s born day. Not to mention the barbeque party with impressive turnouts held at the front corner of the house, filled with bottomless “bandung soda” and meatiest of meat we jointly marinated using self-invented concoction. It tasted heavenly.

Looking backward, I did have those joy and laughter moment. My life is not that boring I guess. It’s just so niggardly hard to accept the fact that we are all stepping up to another phase of our lives. In denial I am now indeed. Instead of venting and whining non stop, I should be more thankful on how things have been assorted for me. In regard to the subject of loneliness, I should stop being self-centered but to appreciate people and my surroundings. My friends are not going anywhere out of Klang Valley which means they are reachable and I should make it a point to keep in touch as frequent as I could, just like I did with my family since 5 years ago. We are bounded by land and sea but a simple call away makes us closer. I never calculate the amount of love I receive and give but I’m sure they are aplenty!

As for now, you need to excuse me, I need to work.

Your Girds

2010-03-17T20:26:00.000-07:00

i've been cutting down my food consumption and managed to shed off some weight. Now i'm 5 kilos below 80kg.. No, no exuberant feeling coz i'm doing this for this upcoming interview, where look, personality and beauty heads on everything. Not even a 1st class degree could secure you the job. I'm there for the money. In the mean time, this is what i consume everyday on ritual basis and i still makan nasi..

YOGURT!!!

yogurt diet is killing me.. and i'm weak & weary..

misinterpretet profession

2010-02-23T07:31:00.000-08:00

The early mental image I pre-conceived prior to joining PB was your ordinary hectic, uptight and generic equipped with sensible amount of stress. What I discovered after almost two months here was totally against that original ideas and I’m constantly wrong. My corporate comm colleagues are totally hilarious bunch of people! Not a day gone without dirty jokes and cheesy anecdotes. With such environment, I find it hard to imagine what’s next for me after PB? On normal days, these usually happen;

3D
One of the scopes covered by CCD is to manning the sponsorships request. We usually deal with health related organization requesting for aids for their projects like “bakti siswa”. Some asking for money, some do asking for products. Approval and disapproval are our daily thingy. For the unrelated sponsorship I would file under file named 3D which means Duduk Diam-Diam – specially for those declined requests. Hehe..

Engaged
Do not accept callers who claimed the line was engaged; instead tell them we’re all married.

Quiet
Sometimes, I do admit our office can be too quiet but instead of the ambience bored us into death or turning us into zombie (at least zombie is fascinating), the random stillness makes us hornie.

Holiday
Living in multicultural Malaysia gives us hefty amount of holidays. With no regard to our personal beliefs, we are encouraged to change our race and religion to get more days off. For instance, I’m taking extra Deepavaali break. No, I;m not Indian and Loganathan gets a week CNY holiday while Tan only got 5 days. I’ll become Malay in September.

Alarm / Reminder
We love holidays, who doesn’t? But to wish “have a good weekend, see you next week’ in the mid day of Wednesday does sounds weird, and it comes along with sweet sound of yawning. Weekend please don’t be late.

Keparat
Corporate comm. is a strategic division game up to provide strategic communication support for the company to appear in favourable image before our external audiences. All utterances, nuances, images must be well communicated to secure & maintain good brand image. But instead we answer all the incoming call with “Keparat Comm, good morning”.

Drugs
Being a pharmaceutical giant, we produced generic drugs for our business customers. I haven’t discovered the production site of it but I do believe some industrial waste disseminated through airborne hence explaining the brouhaha or “ting-tongness” we endeavoured in office.

Promiscuous
Nevertheless, we always have plenty of room for love, never deprived of love every single day. From the boldest confession of a promiscuous wife, to the hopelessly devoted agape lover, we are bound for another love epic in the making. Love conquers all?

that's my lunch - entree

2010-02-10T22:06:00.000-08:00

This writing is dedicated to that being – I was smitten by you

I never thought I need more love,
For I always in denial, always in bluff,
The ego of the brotherhood makes my heart in plough,
Let it all out, I’ve had enough,
Truth is told, though rough and tough,
Now I’m a man, with all that stuff!

You grin, you laugh, you give me power,
I blink, I blush, well those my majors,
Wish I could cut and paste every minute every hour,
The general’s daughter is the one to shower,
With love and flower i swear won’t sour,

But maybe any day,
I’ll come bended on my knee, won’t let you dismay,
That’s to solemnize when the green lights say,
Wish the whole world come in unison to pray,
As we meet, we commit, for so many years to stay,
Love be bigger than hate, that’s the way...

My sincerest, honest, frivolous dedication of my strange feeling for you. Lame? I don’t know but I don’t care..

Sweet Child of Mine

2010-01-29T01:19:00.000-08:00

I was at the immigration department, Shah Alam where the following conversations took place:

A: Darling, I dah penat dah tunggu. Berapa lama lagi kena tunggu ni?
(Darling, I’m tired of waiting. How long do we need to wait?)
B: Kita terus pergi breakfast lepas ni ye baby? Baby mesti tengah lapar ni.
(We go straight to breakfast after this ok baby? You must be really hungry)

Ok, let’s just assume A is a guy and B is a lady. I’m quite sure A is a fresh grad just stepping into his first job. Overtly clean cut with few acne scars on his face indicating post-puberty hormonal change. The closest resemblance of him would be the infamous ex-political aide, Saif*l B*khari Azl*n – yes, the cute boy whom in full faith and confidence declared on national TV of being gay-fucked by his former orientation-curious boss.

B on the other hand looks convincingly like your generally depicted flamboyant “makcik”-next-door minus the stones and the bling-bling she struts with pride. Imagine Tina Turner clad in glittering Kebaya. Strangers like me could not help but to glare in astonishment witnessing her unique sense of style.

The human in me could never avoid the tendency of creating pre-conceived notions for almost everything. Fishy conversations above made my eyelids failed to remain closed but to stay wide open along with subtle grin. Luckily everybody was busy with their many businesses and could not care less on what’s happening around. Or I’m the only one in the crowd with the least number of exposures to cougar’s love? Well, at least these two lovebirds provide me some free entertainment since book could possibly make me turn sleepy. The romantic scene continued with lots of patting, hair brushing and needless pouts been exposed although no X-rated action been demonstrated.

Before I forget, they need passports to gain access to their ultimate dream holiday, Bali. They were only few minutes away towards claiming their passport to the sandy beaches of Bali when I had to make a move to collect my passport. No, I’m not going for a holiday anywhere at least for now but I do wish to someday go for one with my cougar’s crush.

task driven all rounded

2010-01-25T07:25:00.000-08:00

People say working life would be totally different than study life. Adjusting oneself to let go the used to be gay and carefree life. No, this is not another emo, sighing, complaining notes but just a reflection after a month at work. Being a PR is not an easy stuff to do but luckily i'm enjoying most of my time at Pharmaniaga. Much of the time i don't have any task to do and i'm longing for one but most importantly, i feel at ease now if compared to my heydays.

I never thought that i could blend well in environment dominated by seniors people where all of them are married. Who says one can't stay crazy even after jump into a wedlock. We always have the unlimited supply of dirty jokes, i find them quite amusing rather than annoying. The best part is tomorrow is the payday!

I'm eyeing the chance to pursue my dream to another level. I'm not gonna reveal the gist anytime soon but i feel it's he time for me to start making the much needed change. In 22 years of my life, i never did anything too much to be proud of or am i just being too humble. Success for me is self-explanatory and i'm eager to be more than what i think i could be. Now, i need to write an essay and i should get rid of this tiredness in order to start. Move on Jay, move on.

p/s: i like this word.. "u buat i jadi gila dan bodoh tapi i suka!"

Happy Meals

2010-01-07T21:27:00.000-08:00

Farewell the old grey life of mine! Finally after the long sombre and vents, yup, about that scary (used to be) 10 letter word - Internship, i'm here in Pharmaniaga as intern!
So thankful to those people on top who have cracked their heads to finally be in unison to accept weird creature like me as intern. I guess that i came at the right time since the Corp Comm Division (CCD) needs more manpower to kickstart the 2010 calendar. Guess what, there are only 6 people in my division! Daily PR routine such as news monitoring has become a staple and i'm still learning though most of the works are still clerical work but no complain i am. At least i'm seated at a right position to grow and learn from the well-versed UEM fraternity.
It's friday - time flies in a wink. I know life will turn more hectic in weeks to come and i'm up for it. Oh ya, i also bought a scooter from online shop for me to use to work. Clocked in at 8.30am - clocked out at 5.30pm, nothing could be more convenient than that. One and only one thing that i need to do now is to loosen up a bit coz i can be pretty uptight and i believe my colleagues can sense that weirdness and akwardness in the air.. sorry, my bad. Hopefully the newbie syndrome will be gone and i'm looking forward for an exciting joyride with Pharmaniaga.

p/s: New Year comes with an uninvited surprise, the "Allah" issue turns chaotic and i don't know why some Malaysians are so shallow in their thinking. It's well understood that "Allah" created all creatures kan? And He doesn't want us to gadoh under His name.. i don't have much to say otherwise i'm gonna get caught. Hello, even ex-mufti also get caught preaching! Quo Vadis Malaysia?

Season to be Jolly

2009-12-15T20:49:00.000-08:00

EMO - one and one thing i can say about my previous posts. After reading it thoroughly, yes i realized that i've been quite an emotional bollock lately. I'm not the kind of person who does proof reading, at least not for my blog. So you can't expect me to check my body copy of writing. I write and write and i'm out. Reading my own post is so not me, MALAS. Not that i'm ashamed of being emo but TAK SANGKA wei.. hahahahahaha..

Being my jovial self for most of the time i understand just how fragile my soul really is. Intimidating, muka ketat, muka gangster, kerek, confident and so on (mostly negatively macho connotations) have been used towards me but looks can be deceiving at times dear, i do broke down at times ( but i don't shed a tear). My seasonal emo under the theme "internship" is actually almost settle anyway, aku yang menggelabah sebenarnya. Some of my friends also haven't confirmed their internship yet, so i'm not the only one in this case. Suddenly there are too many offers. Good things come when you most not expecting it. But let's just put the internship thing aside for now. I'm in good hands that's for sure.

The main highlight of the night is the Christmas season! As usual, i'll be home to be with my dearest family this time. Most of my friends have already started their internship stint at their respective organizations. All the best! and yes, i miss them so very much! I'm in the mission to fulfill my wish list, only one left unfulfilled. Still got time ah? Will post more in Kuching and i wish to write more since the mood is right on sky high. Reunion, rekindle, gathering.. here i come..

p/s:And they say they know all about me but actually nobody really knows.. if you want to know, then ask la..

dream of an amazing year out

2009-11-30T04:07:00.000-08:00

I went to another interview last week. Impressive for me to attend 2 interviews in a week and guess what? I got selected! My training is suppose to start today but i decline though since i was only underwent the interview for the sake of accompanying Cacak - yep, he got shortlisted as well and went there he did. I can't afford to come to the training since it starts as 6 pm and it's too far from Shah Alam. Better not than to regret then. Good Luck to Cacak!

INTERNSHIP

This is another never ending dilemma of yours truly. No answer from any company until now, no i'm not devastated yet, in fact i'm so enjoying the holiday by doing nothing and waking up late every each day but i guess i'm ready to embark on a new journey. Here are the list of organizations that i've had approached:

GAB, Annexe CM, KLPAC, Sime Darby Property, X2, Foetus International, TNB, World Comm, Galeri Petronas, DIGI, Reputation Mercatus, Go Communications, Perception Management, Sarawak Tourism.

I truly appreciate those who replied even if it's a decline, well at least they let me know. My second plan is to take a semester off (or a gap year) and working part time anywhere, only to resume with my internship the next semester. The downside as they say, i can't grad with my batch but there's nothing much about graduation other than the long waiting and looking at current situation, convocation might be an unpleasant experience for parents, pity them. But this is another random thought of mine so i haven't decided yet. There's so much energy i have now so future employer, you better check me out!

what to do to fill my GAP YEAR

work part time, continue volunteer work, participate more in civil movement, read more history book, lose weight (i know & you know), improve writing skills, revamp image (if i were to pursue PR lah), apply for overseas internship (haha), and reconnect with my Sarawakian roots (neglected them over the years), and the foremost thing is to - FINDING MY WAY.

Been lost for quite some time. Lead a very relax life but where am i heading to actually? I have to wake up from this dream and reposition everything well at least into something similar to a plan. A gap year wouldn't be a waste if i'm gonna use it to the utmost so i hope to wake up to a newfound wisdom. hehe..

p/s: watched New Moon last Thursday - first day of screening! So much of being taksub - Na, i don't even read the book but the second installment was great in terms o acting. Each character went very deep although i hate Bella for she can't get over Jacob but Kirsten Stewart is my favourite actress for her excellent portrayal! Ed Cullen is still world's favourite vampire and he just single-handedly enthralled the ever-smitten girls crowd (and some guys, oopps!). Dakota Fanning as Jane had so much persona even though she appeared in mere seconds.

One of many Hopefuls

2009-11-22T20:50:00.000-08:00

Life seems pretty boring lately. Status: waiting for my passing for practical training. I bumped into this job ads on Facebook on Saturday from let's say XX company. I've been a regular customer to this joint and kinda like admire the work concept, from attire (yes, they have uniform), flexibility hours and much more. Randomness in my head said i need to go and suddenly i'm there already waiting for the interviewer to interview me. Well, the most interesting part was my interview. The questions asked were so like KBKK, you know, when i was a primary school kid they have this thing which stands for Kemahiran Berfikir Secara Kritikal dan Kritis. They gave me a situation and find a solution to it. Really enjoy it and i wasn't nervous at all! In fact i'm the one who's in control and somehow overshadowed the interviewer. Hehe..

Among the questions:

1) If you were in an uptight negative situation, what would you do?*

2) Share with me your latest accomplishment.*

3) How do you measure your pride in doing works?*

4) Most important quality that you desire at workplace?*

5) How flexible are you in multitasking? (boring)

6) How do you see the importance of CSR activities for the company. Suggest one CSR activity suitable for the company. *

questions with * sign are my favourites!

I was trying hard not to look cocky since lots of first encounters said the same thing bout me. I did jokes about it saying don't judge a book by its cover and show my hygienic side by showing my newly kept fingernails. Well, the manager said she will contact me in a week so i hope they will evaluate me well. I should have speak Malay a bit since the other crew were babbling behind me (like i didn't hear it) whether i can speak Malay or not. Fret not, i speak better dialects than most Malays. hehe..

I'm yet to reveal the company i applied for but if i were to work there, i will start to think about taking a gap year. A big decision in a long time. Will share more later. Next post would be about GAP YEAR.

results!

2009-11-21T04:12:00.000-08:00

Yours truly is still stuck here in Shah Alam, yes, a place where people come to die. Na, it is not that bad, in fact the shitty cold weather helps a lot for creamy dreamy sleep. Reminiscing on my hectic schedule last week, i'm so thankful of this reclusive treat.

Internship - still no progress. I don't know why. I couldn't care less with it. Same goes with few mates. Wasting my time with Ugly Betty and long-forgotten movies in the midst of torrential showers outside - sweet!

I'm thinking of starting something new, doing it without a care. Too much thinking i guess..

I.N.T.E.R.N.S.H.I.P

2009-11-01T10:57:00.000-08:00

Finally able to catch a breather after many sleepless nights and broken pencils! Yours truly was so damn busy with many commitments and still he is. But enough grinding. Will spill some for you later. In a month, i mean mid December, i'm suppose to start my internship, the major problem now is that i don't get my placement yet. Attended one interview but declined, application after application yet still no reply. I don't really bother where to intern, just need a place to go. Would you care to help? At least with some contacts? I'm a PR student anyway. Thank you very much.

...

2009-10-05T06:42:00.000-07:00

STUDY

and

WORK

Dealing With a Life that Sucks...

2009-10-02T12:12:00.000-07:00

Am i losing my passion for life? Sort of true lately but not to the point till i want to end my life. Choi!

Have you ever felt not being appreciated? For me, many times. But never before i'm being disappointed by this particular matter; EDUCATION. Just ask anybody who knows me, they will know how much i value education. In fact i always hunger for new knowledge, just about everything moreover when it comes to social, contemporary and history. These three topics which falls under social sciences are the best to ignite my will to stay put reading or surfing the net for hours.

But some people managed to poisoned me to let go my love for reading just entirely. Because of "you" i rarely have the time to read, for i would rather go to sleep instead. And just so you know, this biggest enemy of mine if ironically comes from the whole education system itself which is "ASSIGNMENT".

I understand more than enough that assignments were meant to strengthen or double the effect of preaching and lecturing that we have received in class, but sadly too much of assignments are actually killing the time of your own. In my case, 8 hours is normal for me to spend for class in a day. I only have 3 days full of class while there is no class on Monday and Friday. But the assignments for PR student like me are way too extensive especially to handle a project involving high profile client and to juggle with other nonetheless pile of work.

Say i'm complaining, nothing but true. The hectic schedule had left my personal space being abandoned. My room is getting messier each day, my stinky clothes are piling high and i send em' to the laundry instead of washing em' myself. Microtrend, My Favourite Wife, Body 2 Body are the waiting list in my reading list. Thanks to the new media, i no longer need to browse traditional newspapers for my daily staple, thus saving every pennies. Since when a mum needs to make an appointment to talk to his son? and even felt offended just now because her son just forgotten her birthday. Such a bad bad son i am now.

I keep on telling myself not to let anything to tear me down but these whole so-called responsibilities are testing my limits. I fear of not be able to complete my fifth semester. I fear my grades are falling down, i fear not being loved, i fear of being a loser! Aarrghh!

Friends, thank you so much for at least managed to light up my gloomy days. Sometimes i just faking everything up so you will not notice. Deep down in my heart, i'm just a mere human prone to every possibilities. Thank you for lending me your ears for me to rant, your shoulders for me to cry on even to the hardest weep.

I know this post is not going to change the current state of being but do pity me for the uneasy feeling inside of me. Each of us has our own trying moment and this my turn to taste it. I hope i will stay the uncertain war i'm fighting in. The most i can do now is to live by the chant:

"Faking it till i feel it"

incommunicado

2009-09-25T02:54:00.000-07:00

Jay had lost his Sony Ericsson W660i phone today.. Gonna miss the sounds of "Kayan Traditional Theme".. I'm in a desperate need of a new handphone...

the daily offerings

2009-09-23T22:00:00.000-07:00

not offerings.. more on ramblings.. It's Raya break! Didn't have the chance to balik kampong this year but Raya in Shah Alam was nothing short of amazing.. Me and my bro from another parents, Lah attacked the new Shah Alam Convention Centre for the Selangor's MB open house. The foods are delicious! No, we didn't meet the MB himself nor did other excos. Also no duit raya but we got alco-gel sanitizers instead! awesome rite! one bottle each.. H1N1 blessings..

Spent too little too much time watching Raya movies on local stations. Only watch Duyung and the rest, i fell asleep! Instead i watched non-stop British Comedy - For God's Sake! The Brits are so full of humour..

Got lots of assignments to finish by Sunday. Started working on AFS thingy - i hate doing clerical woeks. Wasn't I supposed to be the deputy CEO? haha.. enough rantings..

Need to discipline myself to start my day early since my normal schedule starts at 2.00 pm. Sure get fired one! It's holiday and i need a reason to be spoilt.. once in a while.. hehe

Trafik Sesak!

2009-09-15T03:32:00.000-07:00

the schedule of yours truly is packed with PR Mode appointments and of course assignments! The biggest challenge now is to finish my academic writing. I'm not even half-way! Still, i've come to the decision to slow down this week to welcome Eid holiday! yeay.. at least there will be no class next week and no meeting.. will do my works at the comfort of my own home sweet home. Staying in Shah Alam during Raya would be a priceless experience. Can't wait to catch Raya movies on TV.

Just you plain-old-boring worth of thoughts... till then!

Arthur's Day

2009-09-13T10:15:00.000-07:00

susah sangat kerja dengan orang yang "busy" ni..

busy apa?

"i kena buka puasa dengan yang tersayang" - ko makan apa sampai 11pm?
"i'll be late since i kat restaurant lagi" - dah janji meeting 9pm, ada aku kisah?
"takpelah, next week takde kelas dia" - even kau dah tau kau nak mati esok pun, kalau dah janji nak hantar assigment hari ni kena hantar juga.

kemudian kau akan buat-buat tak bersalah ala2 aku sorang yang bersalah hanya kerana aku sukarela habiskan semua kerja-kerja tahap merapu kau tu.

B.E.B.A.L.

p/s: diilhamkan dari kisah benar. watak diubah untuk kesesuaian plot.

maklumi aku yang belum diketahui saja

2009-09-07T07:29:00.000-07:00

Aku pemalas. Ya, itu aku sedia maklum dan tak perlu kau susah-payah nak beritahu aku. Part 5 dah sekangkang jalan dan aku akui semangat tenggelam timbul, sudahnya membebel di blog dengan penulisan bertaraf sampah!

Aku pernah ada jari-jemari yang pantas menekan kekunci laptop hasil buah fikiran yang bernas, lalu aku cernakan di dalam blog. Sekarang payah benar mahu lihat tulisan berisi penuh makna dari aku. Entah, bakat tu Tuhan nak tarik bila-bila masa je boleh, aku mengerti.

Tapi masalah ini bukan aku seorang saja yang alami, dua tiga teman pun mengeluh hal yang sama. Aku andaikan disfungsi ni sebagai "mati pucuk", bukan secara seksual tetapi intelektual. Masakan akak yang punya rekod DL sedari part 1 boleh mengomel writer's block! Walaupun aku tak lah memuja Dean Listers lantaran sesetengahnya hanya hebat di ranjang ujian sahaja, tapi aku tahu mereka ni jenis yang kuat berusaha, rajin. Bukan sekadar lahiriah hebat dan gifted.

Pokoknya sekarang proses 're-shuffling' minda dan attitude memang perlu dan aku tak bersedia. Kerja-kerja yang berkodi-kodi banyak lagi yang tak selesai. Usah omel hal kualiti - memeh-sememehnya! Pada yang simpati, berilah 'akal' buat temanmu ini kerana dia dah tak punya semangat nak teruskan perjuangan walaupun baru 22 tahun! Beri kanlah Qi yang perlu untukku bangkit berjuang. :(

ai kata, yu kata..

2009-09-03T10:56:00.000-07:00

u kutuk i tapi i tetap puja you,

you tahu tak kenapa i puja you?

sebab u kutuk i..

Tanah Merdeka..

2009-09-01T01:01:00.000-07:00

Looking at the current status quo, i think some of us Malaysians are being too complacent with what we have. Yup, our state of being has been peaceful with a few riots once in a blue moon, by-election once a month, and Merdeka once a year. Personally hate the fact when people wishing "Happy Birthday Malaysia" on 31st August -out and loud. I don't know what these pathetic morons did during history lesson. Malaysia was formed on 16th September 1963 and 31st August is the Merdeka proclamation for the peninsular which was then Tanah Melayu. Get your fact right!

Malaysia should have 16th September declared as public holiday - it's nothing less important for we are using the name Malaysia for our country till the end of the day. They say it as a matter of standardisation but there's nothing wrong to re-shuffle the date or to commemorate 16th September as well. For me, i'll proudly wave my Jalur Gemilang up and high on 16th September!

p/s: miss my dearly Sarawak where things are less "racially defined" compared to the "Peninsularians" (not all) who categorize everything based on race. Luckily KL is more liberalize. How did you celebrate your Merdeka? Mine, watching horror movie and enjoying my roti boom :-)

aura kamu

2009-08-30T03:00:00.000-07:00

i don't need to look straight to your face to feel it.. in fact, i don't even stare at you, you were at the back, sleeping heavenly with blistering snores ever.. creating a nonchalant tension in the atmosphere.. don't you wake up, sleep tight, i'll take care of you.. even when the world goes cramped..

ada aku kisah / do i really care

2009-08-27T11:30:00.000-07:00

I don't care what the people say,
They probably lonely anyway,
Baby don't fill up your head with he said, she said...

by John Legend

Moving Sunday

2009-08-23T10:10:00.000-07:00

Woke up around 11.30 am, way off from the early target of 9am.. but to hell with with it. It's Sunday anyways.. straightly laid my hands on the book i bought yesterday, reading it until it's 2.00 pm and rushed to shower. It's must-do, even without a date or appointment. Just can't live without showering. Resumed my reading until i realized it's 5.30 pm and house buddies went to bazaar Ramadhan. I fell asleep instead and not joining them. Fortunately, kak Alin was also happened to oversleep! Then i got a friend for dinner.. Had Mi Goreng for me, Bihun Tomyam for Alin.

Loads of work to do back home, finished everything by 1 am, will continue with studying for 3 hours for third language after this. Damn tired, but really thanked the great energy i've gotten from the book and the people i've met. Korang memang rock!

Monday blues akan bermula.. energy setakat ini okay saja.. my rusty brain still works, don't worry k..

oh, leganya

2009-08-21T09:47:00.000-07:00

Sudah cukup dengan bebelan dan sumpah seranah di minggu yang sudah. Menipulah kalau cakap hati dah lega maksima tapi bolehlah, forgiven. Patutnya kumpul tenaga untuk banyak lagi kerja-kerja bertangguh yang perlu konsentrasi jitu. Belum lagi cerita pasal thesis yang tak tersentuh langsung! Semua ini dugaan dan aku cuma perlu anjak ke gear seterusnya untuk mara. Undur nyata langkah enteng semata. Ini janji untuk dilunas minggu depan..

1. untuk mempersiap thesis
2. untuk re-do CV (hampeh bangat)
3. tukar playlist yang dah basi
4. pulangkan buku MBSA
5. baca semua buku dan artikel (yang ini aku suka)
6. fokus pada kuiz dan kerja sekolah (tak suka nan terpaksa)

Terima kasih buat my muse yang kasi perangsang dalam luar. Tabik berganda memang tak memadai jika diukur dengan chi yang kau beri. Mungkin kita perlu jumpa lebih kerap berkopi-kopian dan aku cuma perlu duduk diam, serap senyap-senyap tenaga kau. Ok tak?

Kau tahu aku sayang kau,

J

tapi bukan aku

2009-08-17T00:15:00.000-07:00

Maaf kiranya aku yang kini bukan aku yang dulu,
Segala uja dan ghairah akan hidup tukar jadi tak endah,
Pada dia aku beri segala tumpu, hanya untuk dibambu!

Ada kala aku terdiam membisu, dalam hati tak siapa tahu,
Airmata mengalir tiada, mujur ada teman setia,
Mengeluh bersama, mengumpat bersama, menyumpah seia!

Hajatmu ingin ku bantu, tapi angkuhmu ibarat ratu,
Madah kau luah sakitnya telinga, meski senyummu lekang bermakna,

Kenapa aku masih di sini, menabur budi tiada henti,
Meskipun bakti sering dikeji,
Akan ku terus membukti diri!

p/s: ini bait-bait curhat ikhlas dalam seminit yang ciput. laju saja ayat dikarang, bukti rasa dan jiwa memang tulus nak meluah!

Expect-the-unexpected - the Dream Team

2009-08-09T05:38:00.000-07:00

The last time i did sports was in part 3 for petanque. I don't see myself as a sporty person but still i do believe that i have a good flair in tactical games that require focus. This semester i joined Sukan Antara Fakulti 2009, representing my faculty in Lawn Ball! I acted as the lead and frankly speaking, i'm proud and contented with the way i played. Due to the fact that we are the "annual" team which only can be seen once a year in action, but actually Me, Lah, Hamdan and Bobby gave a kicked-ass performance. Expect-the-unexpected is truly a definite word to describe out team.

The game was played in a league system whereby we were put under team D along with Pharmacy, Medic and Chemical Engineering. Guess what? We merged as the group the champion, beating all the team! That means, we would play in the quarter final against Computer Science.

On a bright Sunday morning, we managed to defeat Computer Science in a very stiff game. Can't describe the feeling, it was great and from there on, all i want to do is to give my best and having fun on the ring.

Beating Computer Science brought us to the semi final to secure ourselves in a top 2 spots. Unfortunately, we lost this time to Civil Engineering nothing much to our surprise because both teams played indeed well and we lost by a mere point. Couldn't believe that we managed to give them a good kick!

The game goes on to the final round, the dream for medal is still on for the 3rd place and 4rd place. Law is the team to beat. We played syncfully and finally ended with a winning point of 11-8 beating Law. We are officially the 2nd runner-up! FKPM's girls team also did well, winning 1st runner-up. The moment of glory came when it comes to the announcement of the winner, camp Masscomm was shouting out and loud when both boys and girls team went up to receive the "humble" prizes from the Student Affair Department.

But the real highlinght to me is not the prize, let alone medal since we didn't get any. The best part was the last moment i made a throw aiming at the "Jack" - for that was the last time for me to play lawn ball for the faculty. After 5 wonderful years as a Masscomm student - This Is It, a truly finite moment after a spectacular show shown by us. Therein lies the true camaraderie, kinship, brotherhood and what not; experienced by Me, Lah, Hamdan and Bob. The experience was beyond sportmanship and achieving goal. Something that i will treasure for the rest of my life. Really grateful for them for the great show - the show that we play, the show that we win. I was once there and no one can take it from me.

10 kali wink

2009-08-05T03:12:00.000-07:00

tonnes of works piling up, countless sleepless nights, bad notions come and go..

BUT you are just so beautifully right there..

nothing much but i just love it..

you've made my day..

promise me that you'll stay..

ok?

to: the mistake that have made me smile..

mistake not worth fighting

2009-08-02T00:19:00.000-07:00

to you know who you are,

Let's stop this and call it to the truce. Sorry for the stupid mistake i've made.. Pleaded guilty

sorry eak :-(

09 best love flick!

2009-08-01T01:15:00.000-07:00

Aku bukanlah berjiwa romantik sangat but seriously this movie finally ignited the love in me! haha.. Simple plot, simple script weren't a big problem if you put outstanding actors like Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. They are trully funny at their own class! Still, my favourite love flick is The Holiday back in 2006 but let's not to compare these two movies. Maybe because it was a long long wait after Bullock's last appearance on silver screen. We truly love her in actions. No spoiler this time and definitely a brilliant movie choice for your other-half. Just wondering why Miss Bullock is still unmarried after countless of wedding scene? Tiada perasaan langsung!

from this moment

2009-07-29T09:27:00.000-07:00

Just finished meeting with the AFS Malaysia - our first "big client" for their 22nd world congress. It's amazing to see so many great people, some of them are the "big names" in the industry, being so down-to-earth yet have so much time to involve themselves with NGO on voluntarily basis. Something to learn there. The next 3 months are expected to be real tiring but based on the first client brief, i think i'm gonna enjoy myself working with these people. It will be the first time for me to do the media relations work, not to mention my other priority as the deputy CEO cum secretary. Gotta serve to the fullest since this is my final term here in UiTM.
Am finishing my CV to be sent for the internships. Wish to have a stint with a PR firm to gain as much as i can. Got a few companies on the list, will be sending the CV to all the companies this Friday. Hopefully i can score myself an interview session and got myself into a reputable firm. Just found out a quote from the late Kak Min when she was once walked out of the pitching session, neglecting the client. This is told by Dato Seri Farid Ridzuan (sorry if the initials is incorrect) in one interview i saw on tv.

"rezeki tu datang dari Tuhan, bukan dari klien"

So true.. nothing but true. There's so much more to life than money :-)

One of A Kind Kak Min a.k.a thestoryteller

2009-07-26T00:08:00.000-07:00

I was totally in shocked to hear the news about Kak Min's sudden death.. still i am shocked. She is one director i really adore n idolize much because of her unique storytelling through her art works. Unity is always her favourite subject to be featured in her works and they never failed to entice everyone's hearts.. never.. now that she's gone, we will never again have someone to capture the beautiful of multiculturalism, love, compassion and humanity the way she did.

Through "Rabun" i got to know love is blind,
Through "Sepet" i learnt that imperfection makes you perfect,
Through "Gubra" i know how to reciprocate love coz love heals,
Through "Mukhsin" i agreed that love is all-rounded feeling,
Through "Talentime" - to love is a cure to hatredness..
surely, there's more to learn in "Muallaf"..

Her stories will become her legacy.. a prophecy to be told and shared..
Kak Min, you are truly, One of a Kind

Yasmin Ahmad,1958-2009

so marah and malu

2009-07-24T05:09:00.000-07:00

why did the school need to have a break over a minimal flu outbreak? h1n1 is overrated in my place.. Zac gave the best statement to describe this so called global pandemic. not that i'm so eager to come to the class but my energy is pumping up and suddenly, you're trying to stop me. i don't have any proper plan for this h1n1 holiday, meaning to say i'm bored to death! will be watching endless Skins, finishing My Favourite Wife, and savouring the cash i'll be getting next week. too much of English show i'm watching now. UK is totally fucking wicked place to be! this big-fat me needs to stop eating, period.

dan hujan pun turun

2009-07-20T21:04:00.000-07:00

Dah dekat 5 tahun belajar kat U entah mengapa present semalam goosebumps wei! I managed to sail thru d 10 mins standing before my fellow classmates. Nasib baik...
Aktiviti terbaik untuk dilakukan ketika hujan turun dengan lebatnya di waktu pagi ialah membongkang! sorry Miss Ida...

Bella yang Hot!

2009-07-18T10:02:00.001-07:00

The saga continues with yet another story about this bespectacled boy wizard spoilt fame. Why did i say so? Harry would never survived any obstacle without the protection he got from Dumbledore and his seniors from the Order of The Phoenix. Daniel Radcliffe however is the most ideal manisfestation of Harry Potter.
I came to the cinema with high imagination since i can still recall every bits and pieces from the book number 6 i last read 2 weeks ago. Result: David Yates can do even more... please.
There's nothing wrong with the adaptation but somehow he is trying to make the flick too commercial with all the lovey-dovey bits . Slughorn character should be stronger with the same aura MadEye has given us. Death Eaters cruelty on the Muggle world truly failed to be portrayed with justice since the book explained that the DE has given Muggles a challenging period. Not to mention lots of settings have been changed totally different from the book. Quiditch, funeral, horcruxes...

Finally Draco Malfoy has his own minutes of fame through his character this time and surprisingly Tom Felton performed outstandingly! My favourite character is the maniac witch Bellatrix Lestrange - awesome, brilliant, i-want-u-more!

The Hogwarts kids have all grown ups and the teen angst seems like the main idea of the movie. As a true follower of the series, i feel contented but pity those who have not read the book, they will feel disconnected a bit since the movie is a bit draggy and totally different. Just how much two years can mislead you with the plot.

Overall, it's not gonna beat Transformers as the best summer movie but a must-watch well at least to all Potter frenzies like me and Bobby.

p/s: this review is so like high school.. haha

ah long hijau

2009-07-16T01:54:00.000-07:00

Aku dicekik ah long yang juga berniat menyampaikan mesej-mesej hijau. Janji untuk dilepaskan Jumaat ni...

bebelan bosan

2009-07-14T07:49:00.000-07:00

sekembalinya dari pulau lagenda, poket jadi kering untuk sekian kalinya, berbekalkan rm50 untuk terus bertahan hingga loan masuk. Hairan, batch aku selalu jadi kelompok yang akan lambat masuk duit. Harap-harap tak tertipu dengan janji 16 hb duit masuk.
hikmahnya menjadi broke is that i consume less food (diet konon). Makan tengah hari di Pak Li dengan Ilya n Kak Bibi menjadi satu dosa yang tak disengajakan. Bising-bising pun melayang RM5.
Huh, masih lagi celaru dengan subjek-subjek penggal ni, terlalu banyak research dan case study, belum cerita lagi hal Academic Writing yang membawa title Honours. Kepala diset pada tahap habis skolastik!
Mimpi sekejap, makan bihun instant campur sardin ikan disudahi seteguk Nescafe Instant, aku ready untuk berdepan dunia...

Pasir Cenang

2009-07-06T07:14:00.000-07:00

pasir berbisik - sungguh syahdu.. bayu membuai terasa dingin..

indah dunia tanpa syarat-syarat yang membataskan, tanpa suara-suara cercaan,

tanpa undang-undang rigid, tanpa waktu yang sering cemburu!

bawaku jauh-jauh...

shenanigans on diet!

2009-07-05T04:33:00.000-07:00

i'm back after been incommunicado for almost 2 months. i'm totally geared up to start a fresh new semester! instead of attending the class, i'm extending the holiday for another one week for the so-called "summer vacation". heading somewhere to the north, to the ideal seaside. Let's pray for a safe trip to and fro... the much needed escapade is totally unplanned. thanx to Lah for the crazy idea :-) it's good to jump to the water without knowing how deep it is once in a while.. looking forward for an awesome adventure! Oh, ya... and i miss you so... a lot!

layak merindu dirindui

2009-05-12T21:25:00.000-07:00

sungguh pun ekspresi muka aku adalah dalam kategori yang layak dibenci pandang pertama pada sesiapa yang tak kenal aku, tapi dalam hati gua ada taman beb! tak pernah lagi aku telan orang tak pun buat busuk tahap defamation act. Dan tentu sekali dalam hati aku ada rasa rindu dan sebagainya.. ingat aku tak layak nak berindu-rinduan?

Ammar S di PTAR 1

Sarah O di Annexe CM

Semalam ialah hari lepas rindu kat member lama, bukan dirancang tetapi kebetulan. Bermula dengan terserempak dengan Sarah O. geng lama time di Puncak dulu, kemudian housemate lama Ammar S. kat library dan panggilan dari Helson Suanie nun jauh dari Sabah! Ohmaigot! rindu bangat sama kalian!

kadang2 kena jugak ambik phone dan cari nombor yang dah lama tak di dail.. apa khabar teman-teman lama?

hey mama!

2009-05-09T20:04:00.000-07:00

ini anthem hari ini, ditujukan khas buat semua mak-mak,

mak dia, mak kau,
mak hayam,
mak nyah,
mother,
muqin,
ammaa,
ibu tunggal beranak satu, dua, dan seterusnya,
ibu muda,
bonda,
etc...

dan untuk my Mommy, for you to stay put with my intolerable weirdoness for 22 years is nothing short of amazing! and you still have so much love to share.

Salute to all Mommies!

cabaran bijak berbelanja

2009-05-08T09:31:00.000-07:00

RM 100 - jumlah yang sangat besar di waktu sengkek ni. pagi ni aku akan membeli seberapa banyak "ilmu" berbekalkan wang RM 100. doakan aku berjaya.

J loves retail therapy juga ya..

mentally tortured

2009-05-05T12:27:00.000-07:00

i hate the fact that we PR students have to seat for 2 papers back to back in one day! the do-or-die International PR and the intellectually challenging Media Law.
i hate it when my friends of other sequence can heavenly asleep while i'm struggling swallowing the historical data of both PR and Law papers!
i hate it so much that this torture will only end this Sunday while others might just pack their stuff and balik kampung today..

the time is 3.40 am.. half insane i am now

and you now that i love you so!

2009-04-30T10:46:00.000-07:00

selayaknya aku bercuti awam Jumaat ni pasal sambutan harijadi berganda 2 teman akrab tahap naga aku. Lahirnya Hamdan Hashmuddin pada tarikh sama dengan Alin setahun lepas tu, Happy 21st Birthday bro!

Sungguhpun aku terlepas peluang untuk balun ko dengan telur dan tepung (pasal ko da lari dengan Biha! hmmpphh..) aku nak wish terus gembira senantiasa di hari muka apatah lagi dengan kehadiran si gadis kak Bee di sisi.. Biha, aku beri sepenuh kepercayaan kat ko untuk jaga Hamdan yang aku bela selama ni, jangan hampakan aku!

Bro, ko la teman tidur yang setia, makan pakai kita sharing dan caring selalu. Biar ada yang menganggu kita kekal menyatu! chewahh, songsang sungguh statement! sukses slalu, ingat ko tu tetap adik aku, so aku tegur2 tu paham2lah yea..

To Biha, actually me n Hamdan dah pernah bersanding dolu-dolu.. but tak nikah, here's d evidence..

selamat ulangtahun 21 bro! haha, cocok!

then she blows the lilin

2009-04-30T10:27:00.000-07:00

"aku ni always the single"
"memang aku tak lawa dan gemok, so?"
"aku paling lemah kalau laki suka kucing, hot!"
"P****t!"
- Alin, dulu dan kini..

Ko dah 22 tahun dah kak Alin! dah besaq dah walopun aku rasa ko tak time lagi nak jadi mak orang.. kita kerja, kita berjinak-jinak dulu dengan dunia yang serbaneka ni k?

Aku doakan ko akan jadi orang yang berjaya dengan cara ko sendri! kitorang akan support ko atas bawah tak kisah orang nak cakap apa, kita tahu dan kita buat! Buktikan pada semua ko boleh...

truly, you are an inspiration, you are somebody and you count!
u did, u do n u will..

selamat ulangtahun ke-22, that's my big sista, Siti Hazlin Hussein.

i should not blog..

2009-02-13T19:10:00.000-08:00

Since the inception of this blog, i know that i will have that little problem called "laziness" to commit myself well at least regularly on this blog. But you know i have 1 million answers to my hiatus - BUZY is the easiest excuse one can always used! The long due post on zachary j. awang should have been published but again laziness prevent me to do so. Luckily that he's always online and i can still get conected to him through Facebook - technology beb! But i promise, i'll update on that soon, let's hope very, very soon.
I woke up at 11, far from the early idea to wake up at 8.. in the morning of Valentine's Day, listening to the splashing sound from the bathroom - it's Hamdan gearing up to meet his loved ones. He's putting a little effort coz it's his first Valentines i guess - so cute! Dress to impress my man! So cute...
As for me, the weather is great! Need to do my laundry, finish my movie review, clean up the messy, fix my laptop, finish 1 book, do the budgeting for my event and the list never ends and you don't wanna know.. it just happened that i'm free to rant on something on this blog today. Cheers!

the chronicles of awang zachary part 1 - "sirih pulang ke gagang"

2009-01-17T06:00:00.000-08:00

My American Dream

5.00 am - 17th January 2009
Reluctantly woke up to the bustling sound of my alarm. To be awaken at 5am is a phenomenal thing to me. Zach is the reason. Fortunately he is flying to the United States of America. The prospect that i know him for the past 4 years keeps me put to stay strong and ready to wave farewell to him. If he's bound to Melaka ke Pahang ke Sabah ke - lama lagi aku nak bangun pagi! Well, we love u Zach..

mamam kt Khalifah

1.00 pm - 17th January 2009
I'm enjoying my roti sardin at Khalifah, PUKOM. Zach is having his roti salad which he shared with Nisa. I told him to eat lots of Malaysian food which he has craving for so long. So happy to see Nisa happy as well - Zach is here once again, safe and sound!

7.00 pm - 17th January 2009
Went to Sri Hartamas with Ema, Wan and Aiman. Still discussing about Zach. Tired of answering the "What happened?" question. Gonna give answer in the next part. For now, Zach is still in Shah Alam je, enjoying the same moonlight with you and me.

Revolutions, Evolutions & Resolutions for 2009

2009-01-05T22:54:00.000-08:00

I took a hiatus from blogging for about a month. So many things happened during that period which i rather not state here. Next time maybe :-) Today, 6th of January 2008 is finally i've made up my mind on what are the goals that i want to achieve this year. You see i always get inspired by my dreams which explain why i love to sleep - it's so inspiring!
The main theme for my resolution this year is ENTHUSIASM - somehow, 2008 has been a fruitful one. First, i graduated from diploma, i started my new life as a degree student, rented a house with a bunch of friends, found some new friends & lots more. Nothing much to be proud of but quite enough to sigh a relief and embark on a brand new year.
The only problem is just my interest, my enthusiasm in doing things has by far deteriorated. I don't know why. I can just easily get bored & not anticipating many stuff recently. Luckily I've found a new wisdom to change or at least figure out some ways to bring back the old enthusiastic me! 6 days of reading and thinking has evolved into something that hopefully perishable to achieve.

1) Be frugal (at least in terms of clothing, magazine or food)
2) Read consistently one book a month or more :-)
3) Join a marathon or walkathon, (I've missed Larian SAF last year) - always did before
4) Improve my Mandarin skill
5) Go to watch PGLtheMusical (again!) and watch concert (Jason Mraz maybe)
6) Be more attentive at class and get to know more people at the faculty.
7) Maintain my CGPA
8) Go for a vacation with friends
9) Learn new skills; picking up guitar (long time forgotten), volunteerism etc.
10) To spread the message of Love to the broad group (Love never fails to heal!)

I'm quite certain with the above list. The only thing left to do is to walk the talk. I'll be 22 this year so hopefully i will be able to reach a new level of maturity though i still think i'm young. hehe.. I got my fingers crossed for all resolutions i've made out and may this year will be an eventful yet exciting year to all of us. Yeehaa..

p/s: Gaza Strip is trembling so much to survive.. Let us lift up our hearts for the innocent victims of Israel's claws. Grant the region your PEACE.

true awakening

2008-11-08T06:09:00.000-08:00

Di saat kemalasan menjelma, Jay mula memblogging. Satu escapism bernatijahkan "mengelat". Poetik sungguh starting. I ain't no poetic. Lama lagi. Tapi bab yang malas tu aku akui. Dua tiga menjak ni Jay yang "mereka" dok kata pandai, bijak, rajin dan yang sewaktunya dengannya ni tak pernah rasa dirinya berada di golongan yang anda labelkan itu. Sejujurnya aku malas. Malas studi, malas nak fikir banyak-banyak perihal studi yang sewajarnya aku runsingkan, terutamanya lepas failed mid term persuasion (meski depa kata fail by 1 poin, fail tetap fail). Tapi aku tak kisah, mungkin rasa kegagalan itu dinikmati beramai-ramai kot (jumlah yang fail lg ramai dari yang lulus dalam kelas aku). Pandangan aku lah.

Esok final writing for PR akan berlangsung jam 9pagi live dari Auditorium Seni Halus Fakulti Seni Lukis dan Seni Reka UiTM Malaysia. Ni satu hal lagi. Kat induk ni, lokasi final berbeza-beza, seluruh Shah Alam. Siapa yang tak kenal Shah Alam boleh sesat jadinya. Mujur ada rakan-rakan membantu beri ihsan tumpang kereta. Cayang korang (mmmmuuuuaaahhhh!)

Waktu malas camni aku akan mula motivate diri dengan tengok movie ataupun cakap kat sendiri depan cermin "konakmampuskehah?" Macam dalam post sebelum ni aku tak nak mati diratap sebagai loser. Gagal exam tu bagi aku loser lah tu, apatah lagi mati sebelum sempat abis degree (x termasuk mati sakit n yg ditentu takdir). Malah kalau fail dalam istilah keluarga aku yang dok kira "A" tu, fail ertinya mampus. Tak jadi orang.

Tak boleh jadi, aku kena studi gak WALAUPUN sejam. Tak kuasa nak fail 1st semester kat ISM ni. Bukti pada "mereka" kau mampu J. Sebenarnya aku memang nak studi, cuma nak mandi dulu, tengok movie dan membebel kejap. Nasib baik jiwa raga aku tak lemah, ikut fizikal, memang aku dah tido. Aku pun dah tak paham apa aku dok merepek ni. Blog aku, suke atu aku. Jay, bangun...

p/s: still tak faham apa gunanya menelan buku just nak bukti pandai.. but aku paham, kite semua terpaksa..

So much for the endearment

2008-10-26T11:51:00.000-07:00

I've just finished watching Harry Potter's fifth installment, The Order of the Phoenix. Thanks to Bob for allowing me to "illegally" stealing it from your laptop. Watched it before at the cinema during my Puncak Perdana years. This post will be the "gayest' post i've ever made prior to the image i've seen in the movie just now.

I would like to ask all the guys out there (if you're a girl, imagine being a guy lor), have you ever adores a guy or at least admire the way he brought himself? You're totally in denial if you answered NO but honestly speaking for me it's YES. My housemates also said yes. What's so gay about fascinating someone else's persona even towards a member of the same sex? There's nothing wrong about it ethically. It's only wrong egoistically.

Cedric Diggory, a character who has been put off to the grave from the Harry Potter series is the case subject. He appeared on the fourth movie (Goblet of Fire) but i've just astonishly into him after the Order of the Phoenix whereas his character dictated as "the late". He's dead during battle with Lord Voldemort but that;s another story. I don't know who's the actor that played the character but i don't care much because i admire the character, the late Cedric Diggory! The way he died is so heroic! People of Hogwarts are all talking about his heroic dead and blame the main character, Mr. Harry himself! You can see how Cho Chang grieved over his loss and reminiscence their sweet times together (Cho used to be his date lor). So now, all questions will be clamouring in your head , what so special about that?

I imagine about how good if i were dead, and so much people are mourning my loss. Some people born and died without much to remember. Being a hero, someone who left a significance memory in the hearts of others is the one we should trying to be. I'm looking at the introspection that we should find out the purpose why we were born into this world. To live, study, get married, haviing kids etc.. are the basic ones but we need to find our niche, our forte. Something that we can say our core that we are so passionate and good at. In Mr. Diggory case, he's a bright student and brave enough to dig out his potential to the utmost by entering Triwizard championship. I just didn't care much for his character in the fourth film and now i adoring someone who's dead! Dead is wonderful afterall as depicted by My Chemical Romance, ahakss!

I just felt the need to share this thing. My writing just overflowing with endless admiration and aspiration. I just hope that if i would die someday (someday we're all will) i want to be remembered as someone who.... ehmm, i have no idea. Meaning to say there's still so much to do, to discover my utmost potential. Seriously there are bunch of unfinished businesses that yet for me to accomplish. I ain't over till it's over and when the time has come for me to end my 'battle' in this world, will i be remembered as heroic as Cedric Diggory?

No, i'll be better!

Kala Malam Internet Laju

2008-10-05T09:17:00.000-07:00

Yet another Eid Mubarak has gone.. Not a Muslim i am, i'm still went home to Kuching for my Raya holiday - a privillege of being Malaysian (lots & lots of holidays!). One week is just enough for me to wind up & forget all the hassle by which i created them myself (some of em' lor).. when you are growing up, easy things are perceived as the hardest. Non-stop moaning & mumblings..
Quite happy when all my friends near & far were back to their villages for Raya. Even Taufiq also celebrated his Raya with friends in Kedah. Better than just being stucked in Sek 7. Now i'm ready for many challenges ahead; assignments & The Black & White Affair. Just need to focus & keep studying till the 11th hour. 3 weeks left for me to catch up everything before sitting for the final paper. Blogging is one way to escape from mental blocked - which explains why i'm updating something on this blog!
One month to go for the big Day - my convocation. It's scheduled on the 21st November 08. The whole family will be flying here. I'm preparing for their arrival. Gotta check out for hotel, transport & "jalan-jalan" plan. Shopping for convo is also in my to-do list! Look up for slacks, tie & formal wear & maybe shoes as well. Show me the money!
Gotta stop here, jet-lagged & lethargic! Will wake up early to do assignments. Thank God, Dr. Mariah has cancelled her class.. Yours truly is sleepy...ZzZzZ

Entiti ini..

2008-09-06T00:39:00.000-07:00

Ianya sengaja di matikan..sebenarnya..

Mungkin hidup semula dari coma sementara, & mungkin tidak..
Harapan tipis..

Alternatifnya, boleh cari pengganti baru di:

www.medioticspart6.blogspot.com

hingga nanti.

Entah...

2007-11-19T01:38:00.000-08:00

Jay kembali lagi menulis entry dalam blog ini. Cuti yang begitu lama bukan bermakna aku ni dah mati atau berhenti menulis. Kesibukan yang mengakibatkan kemalasan. Hidup di semester 5 ini rasa terhimpit sangat tetapi sedar tak sedar dah habis dah pun! Memang sibuk dan super mencabar. Nasib baik dah selesai semuanya dan kini bercuti di rumah menunggu results yang hendaknya OK.
Aku akan kembali dengan entry yang lebih kerap pada cuti ini. Aku janji. Segala yang berlegar dalam hidupku yang bosan ini akan aku cuba bawakan. Perkara yang menghairankan aku ialah entah bagaimana seorang rakan mempunyai link ke blog ni dalam blog dia. Ni tak boleh jadi pasal aku tak pernah pun cerita pasal blog ni kat sesiapapun. Memang kau berbakat jadi papparazzi Nini. Hehe.. Aku tak kisah pun, cuma terkejut bagaimana kau boleh jejak aku dalam dunia yang nak kata kecik tak kecik, nak kata besar tak besar..
Post-post lama yang mungkin ada terkutuk orang ke aku minta maaf tapi aku takkan delete pasal itulah kenangan namanya. Tapi aku tak harap pun orang ramai masuk kat sini dan mintak-mintak takdepun pasal aku bukannya celebrity blogger!
Selamat bercuti kepada yang tengah bercuti dan selamat segala-galanya. Lain masa aku celoteh lagi...

Semester 5 2007

2007-07-15T00:01:00.000-07:00

Semester Julai - November baru sahaja bermula. Aku kini berada di Part 5. 2 tahun tempoh pengajianku di UiTM. Pantas masa berlalu - masa amat menakutkan. Fokus hidup kini lebih tertumpu dengan tugasan dan hal-hal grouping yang menuntut komitmen penuh. Janggal rasanya setelah sebulan lebih berehat di rumah tanpa perlu memerah otak. Hidup mesti terus. Konflik grouping telah pun dibereskan dengan penuh diplomatik. Banyak visi dan misi yang perlu dilunaskan pada semester ini. Azam baru aku antaranya:

1) study lebih awal daripada biasa. Tak nak procastinate kerja. Buat secepat mungkin.
2) promote public awareness on CLIMATE CRISIS & MINORITIES GROUP.
3) DL!
4) Lebih friendly
5) Buat baik berpada2, buat jahat jangan sekali (BE NICE)
6) Go to St. Mary
7) Networking & apply internship kat mana2

semoga apa yang diimpikan akan termakbul. Aku bolah janji yang aku buka hanya sekadar hangat-hangat tahi ayam semata-mata. Tolonglah. Doakan aku berjaya. Aku mengharapkan yang terbaik.

the hardships towards the finale....

2007-04-07T09:44:00.000-07:00

The upcoming days will be fullfilled with tons of works. They are not the excuses for me to not to succeed. Life must go on. Plus, there's only one week left for this semester. I'm so excited! Can't wait for everything to be over.
Oh ya, just wondering why is so hard for women to say what they wanna say. Speak out girls. There's no use to be hypocrite. I hate hypocracy to the most. If you are not satisfy with anything, just voice it out & hear what others say. It's not that hard. At least it's better than just nodded your heads & pretending that you are agreeing but deep in your heart there's a big NO?
Please don't do things in emotional ways. Females are emotional creature, yes but please improve yourself and be like other iron ladies. They can stay strong, dealing good with men and highly motivated. Passionate is the key to success. To stay in moderation is not the way to success especially you are presenting something to your audience. Tolonglah...
This post is dedicated to somebody. Please try to be open. For you, everything have to be your way or no way. If you think so, then just go away! You are not living alone in this world so please be tolerant. Plus, you are in the masscomm industry means that teamwork is our thing. If you can't work within the group, so you are in the wrong direction. It's just a point of realization that i just wanna tell you...
This post sounds personal but hey, i'm okay now. I'm happy & i had successfully released my tension regarding this girl. I'm telling the truth. I'm not the one who thinks so. Whoever wanna call me evil or "mulut puaka", go on. I'll be just fine. This is not a gossip. I'm also not sensationalizing gender bias. I love girls. A sophisticated one.

p/s: Dear Lord, hear my prayer. Help & guide me in whatever i'm going through right know. Lead my way to triumph. This is ask through Christ our saviour. Amen

Busy ke?

2007-03-05T12:20:00.000-08:00

Okay, i know it's been a month since my last post. But i got nothing to apologize for because i'm the only one who stop here! Yeah, i create post for my own reading purpose. Bukan masih tak yakin nak publish kat orang ramai, but it's just my thought about doing blogging for my own personal reason. Memang aku very secretive. Then call me Mat Rahsia!
But this thing is gonna change in the next few days as i already told my mum that i'm a blogger. Yelah, dah anak dia jauh-jauh belajar ni dia pun nak tau juga my condition macam mana. Makan minum, study & rambut yang dah hampir jadi Anuar Zain wannabe ni! My pocket is in a serious condition right now. PTPTN ada dok membazir, tu lah padahnya. Adik-adik yang bakal masuk U nanti, don't follow my steps. Ironically, i won't regret the way i spent my loan. I've managed to buy what i want. BermanJay 2, 4 new clothes, jeans, and the best part is a trip to Genting! I had a blast there! Truly the place where i wanna be. I like the weather, the people, the ambiance, the flower... Everything!
Here's the sneak peak:

"flower power" "happy 3 friends: Ena, Wan, Jay

Seronok tu memang seronok but i'm quite a acrophobic. Gayat siot bila kat tempat tinggi. Takut-takut pun tetap naik corksrew coaster 2 kali. Hehe.. Live life to the fullest!
My fear factor

Everything just happened so fast. Enjoy sakan kat puncak tu sampai tak ingat dunia. malam sempat pula balik Puncak Perdana. Nothing is imposible. hehe...

This week will be the busiest of em' all. 4 tests in a row. High profile interviews plus the usual club thingy. Honestly, my motivation for club's commitment had turned down. Tak tau kenapa but maybe tak serasi lagi with new committee. With my treasurer position, at least i can get rid from that same old biro makanan. Bosan dah. In the next 2 weeks nak kena pergi Melaka pula for my junior's induction day. Dah la peruntukan takde pun masih nak pergi lagi. I'm against the idea actually. Sorry Juan. Tapi kerana semangat masscomm, i turutkan jua.

I have to stop. Pagi nanti ada Publishing test with mdm. Zaiha. Kena study lagi. In the afternoon, ada pula box files checking by Mrs. Raj. Pun tak ready lagi. Gotta spend the whole night completing everything. Tak nak messy. Khamis pula ada interview with Alaf 21 & Friday is the 2nd quiz for economics. Study lagi. So, it's all about makan buku, minum buku, tidur buku. So not me la! But nak buat macam mana lagi. I have to maintain my pointer. Takkan nak biar jatuh. Reputation is a serious deal beb! Every single point counts.

The next post will be my reviews on the interview sessions with my 2 so called idols. Very inspiring men & quite popular as well. Professionals in their own respective fields. Siapa? Tunggu... time is money!!!

rasa lega...

2007-02-02T08:01:00.000-08:00

Jiwa terasa lega sedikit setelah dugaan pertama semester ini "berakhir" dengan kegembiraan. Assignment proposal for Puan Nora's class. Siap jua akhirnya. Group aku, Dots and Plots adv. memang aku sayang! I love them so much! Mula-mula tak sangka yang chemistry kitorang akan jadi ngam. Boleh satu kepala rupanya kitorang. haha! TQ so much... Friends are so precious to me & assignment ni menjadi because of our satu kepala attitude... Dots & Plots Hidup!

Nadai mood ka komen lebih-lebih. Pokoknya, aku happy & hope that i'll manage this life systematically for this sem. Sebut pasal KAWAN, here's some cute frenzy shots bout' my friends. Love em' so much!

taken at Shah Alam Wet World Aquarium(we look damn young!)

Ni pula time di Bukit Cherakah for explorace

i found my peace...

2007-01-23T18:53:00.000-08:00

It has been a month since i started this blog. Fuh! my new semester seems so busy with lots of assignments. Oh ya, i'm currently studying something related to the media and communication. After 3 semesters, finally i found that i'm still can be considered as scholastic - there's one subject that really needs analytical thinking and pushing to the limits of my logical side. Shocked at first. But i think i'm not gonna fail this paper. Never!
Now i'm in my PUB class with Mdm. Nora. She's a little bit scary when i first met her but now i found that she's a normal 30's women. With a family and work. She's approachable and witty. Although i got tonnes of work for her class, it's okay. Gotta make sure that i can pass.
Above statements might create a sentiment that i'm an over-confident and optimist. Sometimes i'm not. I'm just a man, it just that today i'm feeling so happy and optimist for any challenges upcoming.
Nothing much to update. Just wanna avoid my account from being deleted. Hehe... Hey, i'm a newbie in this blogging thing. Give me some time. Till then, Adios...

Anecdotes: I'm studying broadcasting, publishing, advertising, public relations and journalism.
Now, what do you FOUND me?

Hari ini dalam sejarah

2006-12-09T03:44:00.000-08:00

Tuk entry keterubah aku ngagai blog tu. Nadai pengawa. Sengaja buat blog sebagai satu lagi ekspresi diri. Nothing much to say. Oh ya, I'm Ja'lood. The lingua franca used for this blog is a combination of Iban (mother tongue), English (govn. aspiration), and Bahasa Malaysia (Malaysia's national language). I promise that i will not bleach the culture and the authority of each language.
Sekarang tengah cuti dan banyak aktiviti dilakukan bagi mengisi masa senggang. Salah satunya, explorasi dunia blog. Mayuh agi entry ti deka dianjung aku kitu. Just wait and see.

p/s: Nostalgia silam... Manis dikenang.